Is Still
Watching




Paul's Twitter Feed

Roll Tide Roll
Dedicated to University of Alabama Football and the Spirit of BEAR BRYANT. Alabama Football is BACK Roll Tide!!!!



U of A Disclaimer
The views, opinions, and conclusions expressed in this page are those of the author or organization and not necessarily those of The University of Alabama or its officers and trustees. The content of this page has not been reviewed or approved by the University of Alabama, and the author or organization is solely responsible for its content."

Click Here

T-Town Weather

Views: 6650

Planning for the fall football season in the South is radically different than up North. For those who are planning a football trip South, here are some helpful hints..........

Women's Accessories:

NORTH: Chap Stick in back pocket and a $20 bill in the front pocket.

SOUTH: Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of bourbon. Money not necessary - that's what dates are for.

University of Alabama: A Designer Outfit, high heels, Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of crown. Money not necessary - that's what dates are for.

Stadium Size:

NORTH: College football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

SOUTH: High school football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

University of Alabama: Every year or so we add 20,000 seats.

Fathers:

NORTH: Expect their daughters to understand Sylvia Plath.

SOUTH: Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.

University of Alabama: Expect their daughters to understand every aspect of the game and marry and give birth to a football player

Campus Decor:

NORTH: Statues of founding fathers.

SOUTH: Statues of Heisman trophy winners.

University of Alabama: Statues of National Championship Coaches.

Homecoming Queen:

NORTH: Also a physics major.

SOUTH: Also Miss America.

University of Alabama: Prettier than Miss America and can drink a fifth of Jack.

Heroes:

NORTH: Rudy Giuliani

SOUTH: Archie & Peyton Manning

University of Alabama: Bear Bryant and Maybe Gene Stallings.

Getting Tickets:

NORTH: 5 days before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus.

SOUTH: 5 months before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus, make a large financial contribution and put name on a waiting list for tickets.

University of Alabama: 5 years before the game you buy a section of the stadium that hasn't been built yet and put name on a waiting list for tickets.

Friday Classes After a Thursday Night Game:

NORTH: Students and teachers not sure they're going to the game, because they have classes on Friday.

SOUTH: Teachers cancel Friday classes because they don't want to see the few hung over students that might actually make it to class.

University of Alabama: Don't play on Thursday but if they did Teachers would cancel Friday classes because they don't want the few hung over students that might actually make it to class see them hung over.

Parking:

NORTH: An hour before game time, the University opens the campus for game parking.

SOUTH: RVs sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend festivities. The really faithful arrive on Tuesday.

University of Alabama: RVs are permanently parked and the real faithful have Condos overlooking the stadium. To reserve their RV space they have to go through the same process they did for tickets and give up their first born male child. He will be returned if he can't play football.

Game Day:

NORTH: A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.

SOUTH: Every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting "Game Day Live" to get on camera and wave to the idiots up north who wonder why "Game Day Live" is never Broadcast from their campus.

University of Alabama: Every student wakes up, has Jack or Crown for breakfast, and strolls over to where ESPN is broadcasting "Game Day Live" to tell the ESPN idiots that they are screwed up and to Boo Lee Corso every time he opens his mouth.

Tailgating:

NORTH: Raw meat on a grill, beer with lime in it, listening to local radio station with truck tailgate down.

SOUTH: 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance from the Dave Matthews Band,... who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off bottle of bourbon.

University of Alabama: Satellite connected 8 foot big screen TVs are set up beside the 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker and bottomless coolers.

Getting to the Stadium:

NORTH: You ask "Where's the stadium?" When you find it, you walk right in.

SOUTH: When you're near it, you'll hear it. On game day it is the state's third largest city.

University of Alabama: You can hear it from miles away. On game day it is the states most united city.

Concessions:

NORTH: Drinks served in a paper cup, filled to the top with soda.

SOUTH: Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the home team's mascot on it, filled less than half way with soda, to ensure enough room for bourbon.

University of Alabama: Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the team's fabulous history on it in 3D, filled with ice. Who would mess up Jack or Crown with soda?

When National Anthem is Played:

NORTH : Stands are less than half full, and less than half of them stand up.

SOUTH: 100,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony.

University of Alabama: 92,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony with the million dollar band.

The Smell in the Air After the First Score:

NORTH: Nothing changes.

SOUTH: Fireworks, Gunpowder (from the cannon in the end zone), with a touch of bourbon.

University of Alabama: Crown and Jack.

Commentary (Male):

NORTH: "Nice play."

SOUTH: "Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs."

University of Alabama: "Help that poor sumbitch back up and break his other leg".

Commentary (Female):

NORTH: "My, this certainly is a violent sport."

SOUTH: "Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs."

University of Alabama: "Help that poor sumbitch back up and break his other leg".

Announcers:

NORTH: Neutral and paid.

SOUTH: Announcer harmonizes with the crowd in the fight song, with a tear in his eye because he is so proud of his team.

University of Alabama: Former University of Alabama quarterback who only drinks when he is awake.

After the Game:

NORTH: The stadium is empty way before the game ends.

SOUTH: Another rack of ribs goes on the smoker, while somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, and planning begins for next week's game.

University of Alabama: Another pig goes on the smoker, standby keg is tapped, cases of Jack and Crown are opened and cigars lit up. Planning continues for next year's games.

Nothing else in the universe comes even halfway close to the glories of Southern football except University of Alabama Football!



Views: 6650

Join the Tide
Put your e-mail for weekly updates on the Tide :

To unsubscribe from list, click here and send an empty email.

Weekly Cartoons
Past Bad AL Cartoons


Last 5 Comments
  • Arkansas Grades (Bama Mike)
  • Shane and the Crimson Tide (tim)
  • Shane and the Crimson Tide (DAYNA CORN OVERBY)
  • One Last One from Shane (BamaGrad77)
  • GUS MALZAHN . . . The Real Deal or a Real Dill (tim)

  • Tide Football - Roll Tide Roll - Beat Missouri - University of Alabama Football - Unofficial site for Tide News
    Copywrite 2011 TideFootball.com






    Site Map
    Weekly Cartoon , Bad Al 2013j , 2006 Schedule , 2007 Season , 2008 Schedule , 2009 Depth Chart , 2009 Iron Bowl Videos , 2009 Recruiting News , 2009 Schedule , 2009 SEC Championship Videos , 2010 Schedule , 2011 Bama Videos , 2011 Iron Bowl , 2011 Recruiting Class , 2011 Recruiting News , 2011 Roster , 2011 Schedule , 2012 Alabama Football Schedule , 2012 Depth Chart , 2012 Recruits , 2013 Alabama January Enrollees , 2013 Recruits , 2013 Schedule , 2008 Bama News , 2008 Depth Chart , Bama Rolls Over Georgia , Bama Routs Arkansas , Bama Routs Clemson , Bama Stuff , Bama Videos , Bama Vs Auburn , Bama Vs Kentucky , Bama Vs Ol Miss , Bama Vs Tulane , Iron Bowl Seasons , Pounding Gators in the Dome , Rocky Bottoms , Scaling The Mountain 2 , Scaling The Mountain 3 , Scaling The Mountain , THE IRON BOWL , Tuscaloosa Weather , Vegas Odds , Wallpaper2 , Wallpaper3 , Wallpaper , A-Day 2012-1 , A-Day 2012-2 , A-Day 2012-3 , A.J. McCarron for Heisman , ALMOST PERFECTLY PROCESSED BULLDOG , Auburn Jokes , Bad Al 2013 , Bad Al 2013 Game by Game , Bad Al 2013a , Bad Al 2013b , Bad Al 2013c , Bad Al 2013d , Bad Al 2013e , Bad Al 2013f , Bad Al 2013g , Bad Al 2013h , Bad Al 2013i , Bad Al 2013j , Bad Al 2013k , Bad Al 2013l , Bad Al 2013m , Bad Al 2013n , Bad Al 2013o , Bad Al After Arkansas , Bad Al After Clemson , Bad Al After Georgia , Bad Al After Houston Game , Bad Al After Kentucky , Bad Al After LSU Game , Bad Al After Missisippi State Game , Bad Al After Monroe Game , Bad Al After Ol Miss Game , Bad Al After the Regular Season , Bad Al After Tulane , Bad Al After Utah , Bad Al Before Arkansas , Bad Al Before LS Who? , Bad Al Before LSU , Bad Al Before the Bowl , Bad Al Coming Back From Rocky Bottoms , Bad Al Going To Rocky Bottoms , Bad Al Juicing Oranges , Bad Al Poetry , Bad Al Sizing up The Gators , Bad Al Takes a Break , Bad All After Florida , Bad All After The Tennessee Massacre , Bad Al's 2009 Menu , Bad Al's Gallery , Badly Beaten Honey Badger Needs Help Getting Hom , Bama Beach , BAMA NEWS , Bama Quotes , Bama vs Florida , Bama vs LSU , Bama's Seasons , Bar-B-Q Bad Al Style , Bobby E Lowder , Brent Calloway , Bryant Denny Stadium Seating Chart , Bye Week , Camboozled , Championship Video , Coach Al , Coach Saban vs The Rest , Coach Saban's 2nd Favorite Charity , Coaches 2011 , Come On Coach 2 , Come on Nick , Division I streamlines rulebook , Dog Stomp Practice , Facts About 2008 Recruits , Famous Alabama Quotes , Finebaum Hat Trick , Finebaum The Coach , Fishing , Forum , Fresh Squeezed , Gamecock Stomp , Gamecock Stomp 2 , High Tide Mike , Independence Bowl , Ingram Won The Heisman , Iron Bowl History , Iron Bowl Results , It's a Good Thing That Elephants Don't Fly , Jesse Williams Video , Laying Stepping Stones 1 , Laying Stepping Stones 2 , LSU Digs Deep one Defense , LSU Slide Show 1 , LSU Slide Show 2 , LSU Videos , LSU2013 , Mad Hatter Turns the Table , New Bear Images , Nick Saban Being Encouraging , Nick Saban's Resume , Nittany Lions , Northern, Southern, and Tide Football , Ole Miss Defensive Seating , Oranges not Properly Processed , Past Bad AL Cartoons , Paul W. Bryant Jr. , Pound the Gators , Process Resistant Tiger , Processing Beef Jerky , PROPERLY PROCESSED TIGER , Quotes about Bama , Quotes About Nick Saban , Rashad's Night Out , Rocky Bottoms , Roster 2010 , Saban Quotes , Saban Video , Shane from Centerpoint , Shane Learns the Truth About the Help Bama Butto , Shane's Guest Book , SIGNING DAY , Slam Cam , Stadium Video , Steping on The Mad Hatter , Stomping The Commodores , The Bear Tells Shane the Rule , The Catch Photo , The Dog House is Ready , The Game That Counts , The Hog Stomp , The Honey Badger makes Bad Al Furious , The Stadium , The Woodshed , The Wrecking Crew , Tiger Ready for Processing , Tornado Slide Show , Tree Hugger Al , TUBBY WATCH! , Warmup Eagles , We Won One , Welcome Nick , What's Mean About Green? , Who's Next , Why we won against Georgia , Will we be able to RV , You Can't Hide Colonel Reb , '11 FL S HaSean Clinton-Dix ,